Laundry Saved My Day?

My husband is on vacation this week. It’s Tuesday and I’m already exhausted! I’ve always wondered if Mike thinks that because I stay home with the kids that I’m just hanging out enjoying a day full of free time. Well, this morning confirmed that yes, sometimes he does.

Yesterday was the first sunny day we had in southern Maine in about 8 days. This had us up and out of the house early, just soaking up the vitamin D. Add to that the fact that our town has an annual Memorial Day parade that my daughter’s school (complete with parents) marches in every year and we spent the entire morning outside in the sun. Sunshine apparently supercharged Mike’s batteries because he was a whirlwind of energy, ideas and activities. All day long.

This morning I woke up ready for a semi-normal day at home with the kids. I had to drop my car off to get the brakes done and as we were leaving the house, Mike suggested that we all drive over and spend the day at MacWorth Island since its so beautiful outside. “Okay, that sounds good, if you can help me with the 4 loads of laundry I also have to do today before we leave.” Mike’s answer was a sort of deflated “oh.”

Hey, I’m all for having fun. But this mama here is the one that still has to do all the housework once the fun is done and the kids are exhausted and hungry and don’t have clean underwear.

Mike took the kids out for a hike somewhere. I stayed home and did 4 loads of laundry. And finished reading my library book. And drank two cups of coffee while they were still hot.

Who said housework’s all bad?

Memorial Day

It was on Memorial Day in 2002 that I started to seriously think about joining the Armed Forces. I was hanging out in New York with my friend Shannon and her sisters to celebrate the holiday with the traditional family BBQ. But Shannon, whose father is a Vietnam War Veteran, has always been very passionate about the military and veterans and she had more than just a BBQ in mind for Memorial Day.

It was Fleet Week in New York, 2002. Thirteen U.S. Navy ships and their Coast Guard entourage docked in Staten Island and opened up some of their ships for tours. The pier was packed with people and I don’t think I can put into words what I felt, seeing those ships towering above us, flanked with men in uniform. It was eight months after 9/11 and the patriotism on that pier was tangible. I could taste it in the back of my throat.

We toured a Destroyer and I asked the tour guide if I could see the female berth (sleeping quarters). Because I was already imagining myself walking around that ship in uniform and I wanted to know what my sleeping arrangements would look like. Normally, that is not part of the tour, but I guess the guide saw my interest and asked a female sailor to take me into the berthing unit. It was awesome. There is just nothing like seeing the real deal up close and personal. It was small, and if you’ve ever seen Battlestar Galactica, they’ve got the racks depicted perfectly. I was mesmerized. I could imagine myself there.

Shannon had set it up that we would each “adopt” a sailor for the day and take them around New York as a way of thanking them for their service. So we met the three sailors that we would be showing around town and off we went. We had a BBQ at Shannon’s parents’ house where her dad brought out a photo album of his time in the Army. This astounded his daughters who said they had never seen this photo album and had never heard him speak of Vietnam. He told the sailors (I wish I could remember their names) about seeing his best friends dying right there next to him during a fire fight and I swear you could have cut the silence with a butter knife.

After the BBQ we went out for drinks, on us. I talked at length with the guys about their service and confided to them that I had always secretly wanted to join the Navy. In fact, I had talked to a recruiter in high school, but when she called my house, my mom told her I only filled out the post card for the free poster! Talking to this sailor, I started to feel like maybe joining up wasn’t such a huge undertaking. He told me that if I wanted to join that he didn’t think I’d have any problem doing it. His words lingered with me for two months before I darkened the door of my local recruiting office.

Boot Camp. I’m on the left.

I wish I could say that my time in the Navy was of some service to my country. That is what I wanted it to be. Sadly, it wasn’t. But I walked away from it with a whole lot of positives. I met some great people that I still consider my friends. I met my husband, who I was able to support from afar while he served our country fighting in Iraq. And I learned something very important about myself. I can do whatever I decide to do. The only thing that prevents me from doing something is my own mind, my own insecurities. If I want to make something happen, all I have to do is do it and not give up. That is what being an American is all about, I think. We don’t give up. We stand up for what we believe in. We do what we have to do.

Today I am thanking God my husband came home from Iraq healthy and whole. Today I am grateful for the American men and women who give up a lot of their own freedoms and comfort to serve and protect us on a daily basis while we go about our regular lives. Today I thank the men and women who have died in service to their country – in service to us.

Happy Memorial Day.

100 +3 Things About Me

I love lists! Others may not, but I’m following some guidelines here. One of them says you should have a list of 100 things about yourself. Really? Do people really want to know 100 random things about me? I guess so. Since you want to know me so badly, I wrote 103 things. So there.

1. I don’t like to be told what to do.
2. I like folk music.
3. I also like mainstream pop music no matter how hard my “music” friends try to get me to listen to cool stuff.
4. I had to switch to listening to a Christian Rock radio station because my daughter started making up songs about taking her clothes off.
5. I’m addicted to Cape Cod Sweet and Spicy Jalapeño chips.
6. I have 2 tattoos.
7. I want another one. A BIG one on my upper arm.
8. I don’t think I have the courage to get a big tattoo where people can see it.
9. My favorite color is green.
10. I want to learn to sew.
11. I got married in Arizona, even though I’ve never lived there.
12. I’ve lived in MD, PA, RI, MI, OH, ME, NY, IL (for 10+ weeks), CA and CO.
13. The 10+ weeks in IL were when I was in boot camp.
14. I was in the Navy.
15. I got out of the Navy earlier than my initial commitment.
16. Not fulfilling my Naval contract is one of the only things I truly regret in my life.
17. I love to sing really really loud in my car.
18. I grew up always having a cat for a pet.
19. My husband hates cats so I may never have another.
20. My parents named me Tamara so that they could call me Tammy.
21. I chose the pronunciation of my first name when I was 2.
22. It’s pronounced Tam-ah-rah.
23. I hate it when people call me Tam-air-ah.
24. I studied Russian in an immersion program in the Navy.
25. My Russian name was Tam-R-ah (without the hyphens. Or the “h”).
26. I don’t always notice when people call me Tam-R-ah since that’s all anyone called me for almost 2 years.
27. I went by the name Tammy until I was 21 and I met another girl named Tammy who I didn’t want to be confused with.
28. I’ve been using my full name ever since.
29. You can tell how long a person has known me by what name they call me by.
30. My eyes look blue in pictures, but they are really a blue-green hazel color.
31. I say my eyes are blue on my driver’s license. Or any other form that asks my eye color.
32. My husband’s eyes are brown, so I thought I would have brown eyed brunettes when I had kids.
33. I didn’t. I had one blue eyed blonde and one hazel eyed brunette.
34. I grew up always wanting 2 kids.
35. Then when I was about 24, I decided I was too selfish for kids.
36. I watched my friend give birth when I was 26 and decided maybe I did want kids after all.
37. I had my first baby at the age of 32.
38. I had my second baby at the age of 34.
39. After my second baby, I wanted more kids. Maybe 2 more.
40. I tried for almost 2 years to have my third baby.
41. I had 4 miscarriages in a row.
42. After that I decided that I was going to stop trying.
43. After being checked by a fertility specialist to make sure I didn’t have any underlying health problems (I didn’t) he told me his theory was that my eggs were deteriorating.
44. I’m 37 and my eggs are bad.
45. This makes me simultaneously defensive (of my poor eggs) and sad (my poor eggs!).
46. I met my husband in my Russian class when I was in the Navy. (He was Army.)
47. No one in our class of 40 knew we were dating for almost 2 months.
48. I dated my husband for 6 months before he asked me to marry him.
49. We got married 5 months later.
50. I have been married for 8 years.
51. My husband, Mike, is my best friend.
52. He is also still smoking hot and has the best butt I’ve seen yet.
53. I used to work as a graphic designer.
54. I drove the people I worked with crazy by making them play 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon with me while we designed ads.
55. I get bored pretty easily.
56. I’m a natural strawberry blonde.
57. I’m 5’9″ and wish I were about 5’5″.
58. I hope my daughter doesn’t grow to be as tall as me.
59. My first job was having a paper route when I was 12.
60. Then I bussed tables at a Country Buffet Restaurant when I was 16.
61. Then worked at Wendy’s, Arby’s and a movie theater’s concession stand. In that order.
62. I went to Hofstra University.
63. I am still in touch with a lot of the friends I made in college.
64. I met most of them my freshman year.
65. I truly love my friends and would do anything for them.
66. I studied Publishing so I could become a Book Editor and read books all day for a living.
67. I discovered its a lot harder than that and it’s kind of boring.
68. Instead, I went into the Publishing Industry working in Print Production.
69. I interned at US Weekly when they were still just US Magazine.
70. It wasn’t very cool.
71. It taught me how to fix copy machines.
72. One of my favorite books growing up was A Wrinkle In Time.
73. I read so much now that I don’t know if I could pick a favorite book.
74. I mostly read Science Fiction and Fantasy Young Adult Fiction. And Romance. Occasionally, I’ll throw a classic or serious literary fiction into the mix.
75. I’m writing a novel – YA Fiction. I’m planning a trilogy.
76. I daydream about becoming the next Stephenie Meyer (There are no vampires in my books, btw).
77. I’ve already Pinned pictures of the house I’m going to build when I’m a zillionaire.
78. I’m addicted to Pinterest.
79. I tried to teach myself how to play the acoustic guitar, but it took too long for my fingers to callus and I got bored with it.
80. I played the flute for 6 years.
81. I downloaded Peter, Paul and Mary’s Greatest Hits to burn a copy for my mom for Christmas, but I really did it so I could listen to it. (Shhhh… don’t tell anyone!)
82. My favorite Billy Joel song is in french and I still don’t know what the hell he’s saying.
83. I used to play the song over and over again on my mom’s record player when I was a tween.
84. Yes, I remember record players. And Eight Tracks.
85. I cry very easily.
86. I hate trying on clothes because I’m not a fan of my body.
87. I’m overweight.
88. If I had a wish from a genie, it would be to make me love to exercise and eat vegetables.
89. I don’t like to exercise or eat vegetables.
90. I hate sweating or being too hot.
91. I force myself to eat vegetables.
92. I’m gifted with the ability of spatial recognition. So if I’m at a store and I’m looking for a piece of furniture, I can eyeball it and know whether it will fit in the space I want to put it in.
93. I like puzzles.
94. I suffer from depression and anxiety.
95. Sometimes my anxiety makes me uncomfortable leaving my house.
96. I love Xanax.
97. I need alone time to recharge.
98. My favorite season is autumn.
99. I always sleep best when its raining.
100. I hate big government.
101. I can easily pass up desserts like donuts, cake, brownies or ice cream, but chocolate candy? Never!
102. I bite and pick at my nails. (It drives my husband crazy.)
103. I’ve written 103 things about myself, but still feel like you couldn’t possibly know me just from reading this.

Pajama Mama

I’ve decided to be a little more serious about my blogging. So I thought I’d go read a bunch of other blogs to get inspired and maybe pick up some tips. I’m not sure if I’ve learned anything, but I do have some questions.

What’s with the fake names for your kids? I don’t know who T-Puzzler is or Prettybaby and I guess I just don’t care. Or are you cruel and you’ve named your kid something along the lines of Moonunit or Pilot Inspektor? (Come on Jason, you are so funny and I love your movies, but really? Pilot Inspektor?) Because if that’s the case, then, okay you are really using their names. But I don’t understand the need for the fake names. Wasn’t it hard enough to think up the first name you gave them? Now I have to come up with a cutesy nickname? Geez Louise, people. I’m going to be here all day trying to come up with fake names for my kids that won’t scar them for life. Should I not use my name either? What are the fake name rules here? Call me Mama, Pajama Mama. (Forgive me, I’ve been feeling completely geek-tastic all week.)

Do you have written stuff in reserves? With all the advice out there about how to become a successful blogger, the one I keep seeing is post something every day. Wow. Other bloggers must be super creative and possibly systematic, regimented people. Because I need to feel inspired to come up with something to write about. I don’t sit down every day and think, hmmm…what can I write about today? and still have the time and presence of mind to actually parent my kids. Maybe I should try to be a little bit more systematic, but the length of the blog posts I’m reading is telling me that other mommy bloggers are really taking some serious amounts of time to write every day. Or do you write a bunch of stuff in advance and then have stuff to post every day?

Do all my blogs have to be lists of something? I don’t actually mind this one. Lists are fun and easy for me. If the answer is yes, I’m going to be so stoked. But I have noticed that all the most popular blogs get the most hits and comments on their list-style posts. I think I need to go sit down and create some more lists.

Do mommy bloggers always have to blog about their kids?  I love my kids, and the entirety of my waking day is spent with them, so I will probably be writing about them the majority of the time. But I think about other things too and sometimes I’m going to want to write about them. It keeps me sane.

If you are a fellow blogger, what one piece of advice would you give Pajama Mama? (ooh, writing in third person feels so cool! Maybe I do like the fake name thing!)

Wordy Wednesdays

Because in my house, there is no such thing as a Wordless Wednesday. Oh, I could post pictures of what we’re doing today on this rainy, cold day in Maine. But that would not accurately portray my life. And I’m nothing if not open and honest about my life.

The only moments of silence in my house are when I am the only one here, or when I am sleeping. Although, my husband does occasionally talk in his sleep and my across-the-street neighbor and his son are into dirt biking. So sometimes it’s not even quiet when I’m trying to sleep. (Did I mention that my dirt biking neighbors have friends that show up in a motor home filled with people who all also have dirt bikes and seem to think its acceptable to ride said bikes before the sun has come up?) Yeah, I don’t get a lot of quiet.

From sibling fights to telling tall tales, reading out loud to answering a million questions a day, I would say that all my days are pretty wordy. My daughter has been very interested in how babies are made. Understandable since her auntie just had a new baby and two of her friends at school have welcomed new siblings since the beginning of the year. So when she has asked me in the past, Mom, how does the baby get in the mommy’s belly? I always answer, God put the baby there. End of story. That always stops the questions. But then my husband has to go and throw a wrench into this perfect answer. We live a very short walking distance to a horse farm. A horse breeding farm to be exact. While Caylie and her dad were watching the newly born foals being all cute and awkward on their spindly legs, Caylie turns to Mike and says, So God makes baby horses, right? And Mike, answers her with, Well, technically, horses make horses. Thanks a lot, Mike! Because Caylie thought about that one for a while and then turns to him and says, So does that mean that people make people? Mike, Yep. Now, I keep getting asked, How do they do that? How does the baby get in there? I’ve tried the seed growing in a garden metaphor but my very clever 5 year-old merely comes back with, but how does the seed get in there?

My son, thankfully, is more interested in his new baby cousin’s umbilical cord. Yes, you read that right. I swear I need a degree in how to answer my kids’ questions! Upon seeing the new baby, Chase immediately pointed to his belly button and yells, What is that? Poop? So I tried to explain the umbilical cord. Good luck to me. Chase finds this new information fascinating and can’t stop asking me about it.

This Wordy Wednesday has been no different from any other wordy day this week. After spending an hour cajoling my daughter to get dressed, brush her hair and brush her teeth, we left the house with me already exhausted and Caylie wearing clothes, with her hair in a mess and bad breath. Chase barraged me with questions about baby Paul and his cord and how does food actually go through it while Caylie interrupted by telling Chase she was looking out his window. A fight over who can look out which window ensued until I finally got to the school. What a long 8 minutes it was.

It is now 3 o’clock. I’m all worded out. So here’s my daily dose of whining. Hope you have a better Wordless Wednesday than I did!

Apocalypse with Children?

My latest obsession is reading post-apocalyptic fiction. You would think, with all the books I’ve read on the subject, that I would be an expert on how to survive the apocalypse. I’ve realized that I’m sadly lacking in preparedness for this event. And surviving with kids? I need to get my butt in gear. This one’s a toughie!

1. I need emergency rations. Whether it is from a plague, environmental collapse, a cataclysmic event from space/nuclear weapons, a zombie outbreak or alien invasion, the one thing I’m sure of is that everyone needs to eat. And I’m not talking about the zombies here. We need a stockpile of non-perishable food. And fresh water. Since the water that comes out of my tap is practically Poland Springs (Maine is awesome) I’ll need to start bottling it. I wonder if my kids will eat MREs? Since my kids complain about everything else I make that is not a chicken nugget, I’m sure meal times will be just as pleasant after the world has ended. Remind me to ask for a food dehydrator for Christmas.

2. Can someone teach me how to hunt and field dress small animals? Hunting for fresh meat seems to be a big trend in post-apocalyptic plots. So I need to start Googling how to make snares to catch small game. I figure we can probably survive for a year on the fat squirrels in my yard alone. The kids can collect the acorns to bait the snares. I’ll tell them the acorns are for the fairies’ inventions. It’s how I got them to pick up the acorns last fall. It should work again, right?

3. I need an underground shelter. Every time I watch an episode of The Walking Dead, I think, “If only they had an underground bunker! The walkers would never get them in there.” (No one better say anything here about WD Season 3! If you spoil it for me before I watch the entire season when it comes out on DVD, I will find you. I will.) I read on grist.org that some developer is building and selling underground luxury condos in case of a doomsday event. Maybe when I’m a zillionaire, I’ll get one of those. Until then, I think I’ll break out the kids’ beach shovels and the kids and I will start digging in the backyard.

4. I need to be able to make useful items out of junk. This sounds like a craft project to me! Maybe the kids and I should head over to the dump and see what kind of life-saving useful inventions we can create with people’s old appliances. I’ll have to see what ideas I can find on Pinterest. DIY Doomsday Crafts? I’m making a new board now!

5. I need a weapon. How else can I properly protect my littles from hostile invaders? Personally, I think I’ll do a Daryl and shoot a crossbow. No bullets to run out of and I’m sure that after the kids and I turn an old oven into a communications device that making some extra arrows will be a walk in the park! Or, in keeping with my daughter’s latest defense, I could just strew a bunch of Barbie shoes and crowns all over the ground to incapacitate any would-be personal space invaders.

6. I need to study botany/emergency medicine/canning. What plants can we eat? How do I keep zombie bites from getting infected? And how the hell can I save these fresh berries for the winter season?

7. I need to start running again. I’ve always said, I only run when chased. Well, if I have to outrun a zombie hoard intent on consuming my plump, plump flesh… I’ll be zombie chow. Guess I need to start training. Mike runs all the time, so he can strap our 50 pound 5 year-old to his back. I’ll take the 35 pound 3 year-old. Did I get rid of our jogging stroller? I tell Mike all the time, you never know when you might re-use something. He calls me a hoarder. I call me a realist.

Full Nest Syndrome

My husband and I were chatting it up last night about all the things we want to do when the kids move out. Since my kids are 5 and 3, I think we have a pretty long wait in store for us. And I secretly hope that my son never moves out. But don’t tell Mike that. I’m sure I’ll change my mind once the teenage years hit. Here’s what we came up with:

Go to the movies. This may sound dumb since there are inventions like the DVR out there, digital cable with a bizillion channels, satellite TV, streaming video and all that jazz. We’re not big TV watchers. We don’t have cable. We don’t own a DVR or have satellite TV. We have Netflix and even then, we only watch one 40 minute show maybe 3 or 4 times a week. There is just something about sitting in the movie theater, watching it on the big screen. I still try to convince Mike to make out with me in the back of the theater, but he gets embarrassed and tells me he’s too old for that. Whatevs, I’m 2 years older than him and I hope I never feel too old to make out! The new Star Trek movie came out this week and we live less than 5 minutes away from the second oldest (still operating) drive-in in the country. Hence, the desire to go to the movies. And while some may stuff their kids into the backseat and take them along, we don’t roll like that. My kids can’t handle a PG-13 movie. And the whole point is to go do something without them. Unfortunately, we don’t know any teenagers to call at the last minute to babysit. And we don’t have the extra money for it either. Do you know what babysitters charge these days?!

Travel (aka Take a Vacation). Traveling with young children sucks. It does. If you have traveled with your kids and you think it was easy and do it all the time, well, good for you. You’re either a liar, medicated beyond the point of caring or you have the best behaved kids in the whole world. No matter the reason, I hate you. My kids do not travel particularly well. They can’t stand to be still for very long. The longest trip we have taken since having our second child is a 7 hour car drive to visit my parents in PA. We make the trip once a year. Then we spend the next 11 months recovering. My husband is from San Diego and we haven’t been out there in 5 years. One, because its too expensive to buy 4 plane tickets, rent a car, get a hotel for a week, etc. and two, because the idea of being on a plane/in the airport for 8 to 10 hours with my wound-up kids gives me hives.

Browse. This one is mine. Last month, my friend Heather drove up from MA to hang out for a few days. I asked friends to babysit while Mike was at work and for the first time, I went out without my husband on a non-anniversary non-holiday to do something non-doctor appointment related – just for me. It felt weird. Heather and I spent the first whole day shopping. And browsing. I had forgotten what that was like since nowadays I only go to a store if I have a list of the things I need. And then proceed to purchase said things as quickly as possible before the whining and/or the “I’m bored” phrase rears its ugly head. I don’t just walk around a store and look at things anymore. It was so nice. I’m tempted to add some more o’es to the word so, but I’ll add some extra exclamation points instead!!!

Eat at nice restaurants. Cause let’s face it, you don’t take your kids to fancy places to eat out. You want to enjoy your meal. You want to enjoy the atmosphere. You want to have a nice conversation without being interrupted or having to pick a fork off the floor 100 times or dodging greasy little ketchupy hands that are sure to land directly on the front of your nice new blouse that you only wore because you’re eating somewhere that uses fabric napkins.

These things seem so simple as I re-read them. And I’m sure as my kids get older, we’ll be able to do these things as a family without me having to take a Xanax. But until then, I’m just going to look forward to it. And try to find some cheap babysitters.

The Top 10 Ways I Keep Myself Sane

This week, like almost all weeks in my house, has been a little anxiety inducing. That’s because I have two littles home with me all day. Plus, I got a message on Monday from my daughter’s pre-school teacher that she wanted to talk to me privately. Man! I felt like I was being called into the principal’s office for the first time. (Yes, I am a complete geek who never got in trouble at school. I’m willing to bet money that my daughter will make up for me in that regard.) Anyhoo, I’ve been doing a lot of sanity-boosting exercises (the only kind I do) to keep me from losing my mind completely. Here are the top 10 ways I keep myself sane (in no particular order):

1. I read. A lot. I’m not kidding here. I’m a total bibliophile. And before you get all riled up and start thinking about how you’ve always wanted to find time to read Moby Dick, I’m not spending my time reading the classics (not usually, anyway). I’m more of a sci-fi/fantasy, romance, paranormal, urban fantasy, dystopian young adult fiction kind of book nerd. I like to get out of my own head. And reading about stuff that absolutely doesn’t exist is the best way for me to do that.

2. I make the kids play outside. This may sound kind of old-school, but I kick the kids outside on a regular basis. And I’m not helicopter-momming it out there with them either. I live in a semi-rural suburban neighborhood in Maine and if they stay put in the backyard, I can sit in my office, watch them play from the windows and do one of the other things on my sanity list. The quiet in the house helps out a whole lot with the sanity thing too.

3. I daydream. As a writer, I find this particularly important. It’s nice to spend time thinking about something other than the things in your life that you worry about, or about all the things you have to get done. Sometimes, just daydreaming for 10 minutes gets me out of my head enough to help me feel a little bit more collected when I have to deal with my real life.

4. I write. Obviously, you know this since you’re reading my blog. But blogging isn’t the only writing I’m doing. Hence the few and sometimes far between blog posts I’ve been not-quite cranking out. Writing can be cathartic and very sanity-saving. (I just love hyphenated made up words!) Sometimes I write personal journal entries. And most of the time, as of late, I have been working on writing my first novel. This is a lifelong dream of mine and I am determined to accomplish it. Even if everyone who reads it hates it. Even if literary agents laugh at me and send me horribly insulting letters of rejection, I will complete this novel. And if it sits on my computer for the rest of my life with no one ever reading it but me and my ever-supportive husband, I will still feel kick-ass because I accomplished my biggest dream.

5. I have a hobby. I love to cook. And I love to troll Pinterest for new recipes to try out on my family. My reading and writing are also hobbies, they are also pretty much necessities in my life. Cooking however… well, everyone has to eat, but no one needs to cook the endlessly heathy/budget conscious meals that I pride myself on. It doesn’t hurt that my husband is constantly gushing about how good everything is while he’s shoveling food into his mouth!

6. I challenge myself. Personally, and I may take a lot of flak on this one, I sometimes find being a stay at home mom boring. I love my kids, don’t get me wrong, but being with them all day… well, it can be tedious. I’m either cooking for the littles, cleaning up after them, washing them or their clothes/bedding/jackets, brushing teeth/hair/doll hair,  or driving them to school/doctor’s appointments/play dates/playground/library… I think you get the picture. These tasks aren’t very mind-bending on a daily basis. So it’s nice to have something to challenge myself with. Earlier this year, I challenged myself to try to cook for a family of four on a $100/week food budget. Then I signed up for a book challenge and challenged myself to read 100 books this year. I’ve read 56 books since January 1st, so I think next time I need to pick a higher number. For my next challenge, I’m thinking about doing the Whole 30. Don’t know what that is? Well, if you don’t want to Google it, I’ll blog about it if I do it.

7. I’m medicated. There. I said it. Yes, I am medicated. Not because I’m a mom, but because I suffer from depression and anxiety. I also know that I am not alone in this reality. It’s my dirty little secret and I’m airing it out right here for all of you. Depression and/or anxiety can really mess with a woman’s coping abilities. And when you are a mom, you really, really need all the coping ability you can lay your hands on.

8. I have some awesomely awesome girlfriends. I can’t tell you how important this is. My friends are the bomb. They truly are. If you can’t say that about yours, you need to find some new ones! I’d be happy to share mine. My girlfriends don’t all live in Maine with me, but they are still 100% there for me when I need them. Friendships change as you get older, get married, start your own families or build your careers up to where you want them to be, but they are still super important for a woman’s sanity. You will always need your girlfriends. Mine have lifted me up, supported me, laughed with me, kept it real, been my sounding board, prayed for me, cried with me, encouraged me, given me advice and 100 other things that I haven’t thought of as I’m typing this.

9. I try to always stay positive. Notice the word try in that sentence. Because I really do have to work at it. It’s easy to get bogged down in the mire of stay-at-home momness. The monotony of housework and cooking, laundry, school drop-offs and kids’ sports could make even the most well-balanced woman lose it occasionally. So sometimes (okay, a lot of times) I have to take a step back in my mind and try to look at the good things. Like, hey my house has enough cobwebs to become a legitimate haunted house over here and I wouldn’t recommend eating off the floors since I have 2 pair of dirty little feet running all over the place all the time, but it’s clean and uncluttered enough that if someone pulled a pop-over-without-calling dealio, I wouldn’t be embarrassed to welcome them in.

10. I have a wonderfully amazing marriage that I put time into every day. I hate when people say that a good marriage is hard work because I don’t feel like investing time in my marriage is hard. You can’t just live your life alongside your spouse without engaging him or her and expect everything to be hunky dory. Marriage requires respect, trust and communication. My husband is my best friend. He is loving and supportive and understands that he married a crazy person. And sometimes we irritate the crap out of each other. But we enjoy being together. We take time to talk to each other, share our feelings or ideas, and laugh together. My husband is my rock. He gets me, insanity and all, and still wants to wake up next to me every morning. I trust him completely and know that I can always count on him. And if that isn’t a stress-buster, I don’t know what is!

The Post-Mother’s Day Bliss Bust

So its the day after Mother’s Day and I wake up feeling a little blissed out. Mother’s Day is better than Christmas, my birthday and any other holiday all rolled together. For me at least. I don’t have to cook anything. I don’t have to clean anything. And I especially don’t have to wipe anyone’s hands, face or butt. It’s wonderful.

After a day of contentedness, I wake up a little earlier than normal, ready to start my normal Monday routine. I get up and immediately know something is up. The kids are still in their room and they’re quiet. Not asleep. Just quiet, with some occasional giggling. I walk into the kitchen and there is a huge mess (which I must admit, looked like they had tried to clean up and hide from me) of watercolor paints, water, brushes and waterlogged paper on the floor and counter.

I tiptoe to their bedroom door and swing it open to find my two little monsters… eating the leftovers of my Mother’s Day dinner that I brought home to have for my lunch today. Oh, and the part they didn’t get to yet was sitting inside my daughter’s dresser drawer. All. Over. Her. Clothes.

Yeah. My bliss is busted just like that. Within 2 minutes of being awake.

I tell the kids that since they decided to help themselves to the food in my fridge, that I was happy that I wouldn’t have to make them breakfast. A big crying fest begins. I call their dad at work at, what?, 7:20 in the morning. After I had cleaned up the watercolor mess and started a pot of coffee. We chat about what exactly we need to do to get it through to our 5 year-old that she can’t just do whatever she wants to do. It’s like she thinks that if no one is around to actually see her doing it, than she hasn’t really broken the rules.

I drink my coffee in my office while I listen to the kids argue amongst themselves about who was responsible for the lack of mom’s usual hot breakfast service. And I smile when I remember that today is Monday, which means I get a 3 hours of preschool break from my 5 year-old.

Now I just have to figure out how to get someone else to pick up all the toys that were left everywhere on Mother’s Day. And make me lunch. And fold the load of laundry I just put in the dryer. *Sigh* I think I need a wife.